About this resource
An inner critic can be harsh and discouraging. A kind coach is honest but supportive, and helps us keep going. This reflection helps clients record situations, what the critic said, how it affected them and what a kind coach would say, then notice the difference.
Purpose
To help clients notice self-critical thinking and practise a kinder, more helpful inner voice.
Who it is for
Primary profession: Counsellors and therapists. Also relevant for psychologists, youth workers.
Client or participant group: Adolescents and adults with harsh self-talk.
Practice setting: Individual counselling and group programs.
Suggested uses
- Working with self-criticism
- Building on self-compassion work
- Group programs on self-esteem
- Between-session practice
Instructions for practitioners
- Explore where the critic may have come from and what it is trying to do.
- Help the client find a coach voice that feels believable.
- Practise in session before using between sessions.
- Notice small shifts over time.
Instructions for clients or participants
- Write a situation.
- Write what your critic said.
- Write what a kind coach would say.
Accessibility considerations
Can be completed verbally or as a role-play.
Scope and limitations
A reflective worksheet for use within counselling.
Research basis
Higher self-compassion is associated with lower distress, and compassion-focused approaches target self-criticism and shame. Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) has a strong research base for anxiety, depression and many related problems; this resource uses CBT techniques to support, not replace, a structured treatment plan.
- Beck, J. S. (2021). Cognitive behavior therapy: Basics and beyond (3rd ed.). Guilford Press.
- Gilbert, P. (2009). Introducing compassion-focused therapy. Advances in Psychiatric Treatment, 15(3), 199–208. https://doi.org/10.1192/apt.bp.107.005264
- Hofmann, S. G., Asnaani, A., Vonk, I. J. J., Sawyer, A. T., & Fang, A. (2012). The Efficacy of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: A Review of Meta-analyses. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 36(5), 427–440. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10608-012-9476-1
- MacBeth, A., & Gumley, A. (2012). Exploring compassion: A meta-analysis of the association between self-compassion and psychopathology. Clinical Psychology Review, 32(6), 545–552. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2012.06.003
- NEFF, K. (2003). Self-Compassion: An Alternative Conceptualization of a Healthy Attitude Toward Oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85–101. https://doi.org/10.1080/15298860309032
What is included
A 3-page printable A4 PDF, including a practitioner notes page with the research basis (version 1.0).
Originality
Original Practitioner Plus content: wording, activity structure, layout and icons were created for this resource. No third-party worksheets, illustrations or text were reproduced.
