About this resource
Young children often feel hurt or jealous when a friend plays with someone else. This short illustrated story helps them understand that having other friends does not mean a friend likes them less. It is followed by ideas for what to do and space to name their own friends. It can be read one-to-one or with a small group.
Purpose
A colourful story about Bo, who feels worried when best friend Mimi plays with someone else, and learns that friends can have other friends.
Who it is for
Primary profession: Educators and school support staff. Also relevant for counsellors and therapists, speech pathologists, psychologists.
Client or participant group: Children aged about 4 to 10, with a teacher, counsellor or parent.
Practice setting: Schools, early years settings, counselling and home.
Suggested uses
- Individual play-based sessions
- Building a relationship with a child
- Talking about feelings without pressure
- Sharing ideas with parents or carers, with the child's agreement
Instructions for practitioners
- Read the story together and talk about the pictures.
- Ask how Bo feels and why.
- Normalise the feeling: lots of children feel this way.
- Choose what the child could try next time.
- Practise with puppets or role-play.
Accessibility considerations
Big pictures and few words. Read it aloud, let the child draw or point, and use their own words for feelings. Print in colour if you can, or let the child colour it in.
Scope and limitations
A play-based activity that supports therapy. It is not a stand-alone treatment, a clinical assessment or a validated tool. Follow the child's lead, stop if they become distressed, and follow your child safety procedures if the child discloses harm.
Research basis
Research with young adolescents links friendship jealousy with lower self-worth, aggression and loneliness, which suggests it is worth helping children talk through these feelings. It was not studied in younger children. School-based social and emotional learning programs improve students' social skills, behaviour and academic results.
- Durlak, J. A., Weissberg, R. P., Dymnicki, A. B., Taylor, R. D., & Schellinger, K. B. (2011). The Impact of Enhancing Students’ Social and Emotional Learning: A Meta-Analysis of School-Based Universal Interventions. Child Development, 82(1), 405–432. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1467-8624.2010.01564.x
- Parker, J. G., Low, C. M., Walker, A. R., & Gamm, B. K. (2005). Friendship Jealousy in Young Adolescents: Individual Differences and Links to Sex, Self-Esteem, Aggression, and Social Adjustment. Developmental Psychology, 41(1), 235–250. https://doi.org/10.1037/0012-1649.41.1.235
What is included
A 4-page printable A4 PDF, including a practitioner notes page with the research basis (version 1.0).
Originality
Original Practitioner Plus content: wording, activity structure, layout and icons were created for this resource. No third-party worksheets, illustrations or text were reproduced. Illustrations and activities were created for Practitioner Plus; no third-party worksheet or image was used.
